To read the latest issue, click 'Issues by year' in the menu above

Maidens full of promises, blossoming and healthy,
Knowing and yet innocent, each a little elfie,
Tattooed, pierced and simpering, posing for a selfie.
Those who don’t are nobodies, left upon the shelfie.

Drunk with fresh testosterone, feverishly texting,
Lads pursue the hottest ones, try to get them sexting.
Smart phones of the young adults, all interconnecting.
Clicking tongues of older folk, all whatever-nexting.

Those who failed to misspend youth now feel somewhat bitter.
Scandalised by what goes on, give a muffled titter.
Dream of what they might do now, young again and fitter.
(But they wouldn’t stand a chance – never mastered Twitter!)