Peter Goulding: Fat Kid In The Restaurant


The fat kid in the restaurant is kicking up a fuss,
He’s sitting with his parents at the table next to us,
He doesn’t want the pizza and he doesn’t want the veal,
The fillet and the gammon steak for him have no appeal.
Spaghetti is a no-no and the chicken breast is muck,
The langoustines are minging and the quiche lorraine is yuck.
Lasagna’s merely vomit, and the lemon sole is tat,
Which kind of begs the question, how on earth did he get fat?

(From A Flash of Orange, a collection of Peter Goulding’s humorous verse.)