"A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou..."
Is how you phrased your invitation. Now
I sit and wonder whether to accept.
I'm used to eating quite a bit more chow
Than just a loaf of bread. I like a chop,
Perhaps some mashed potatoes, which could sop
Up gravy, plus some peas, a bean or two;
But bread and wine? I'd call that meal a flop.
I know what's on your mind: you think I'll come,
We'll eat, and drink, and hear that distant drum,
And then we'll have ourselves a sexy romp.
I have to tell you, Buster, that is dumb.
It's true you are attractive; even so,
I'd need a lot more sustenance to go.
Regarding your entreaty re tonight,
My moving finger writes, and it says no.