It’s no go the endless talk
of property prices and sex:
and I’ve no desire to meet your friends,
your accountant or my ex:
and I’d really rather prefer to avoid
the risk of salmonella
due to you copying cooking times
wrongly from Nigella.
And it’s no go a repeat of food
which last time looked like slurry.
all I want is a night at home
with a take-away Indian curry.
So I’m no-show for your “Dinner At Eight”
and its lack of fun and laughter --
plus the violent indigestion
which I know would strike me after.