Let us give thanks for lycra tights;
they sleek our days, streamline our nights,
transform the lumpiest of wights
rrrrto Betty Boop.
Let us exalt the silken thigh,
and all the myriad hues of dye
which fold it in a rainbow sigh
rrrrrand never droop.
Tights rehabilitate the knee
and guard our femininity
from groping satyrs on the spree –
Oh, soft embrace! fore and abaft,
which neuters every upward draught
and lets us twirl and lets us waft
rrrrrlike Cyd Charisse!