A Visit from Saint Dick -- Chris O'Carroll

A Visit from Saint Dick


Twat the night before Christmas, when all through the house
She yanked down my pants and I tore off her blouse.
Our undies we flung everywhere with no care
For tidy decor; we just had to be bare.


The children were sleeping, but we were awake,
And holiday whoopee’s what we chose to make.
She sugared my plums (she’s the queen of good head)
And I made her exclaim on the floor and the bed.


Had a jolly old elf and his eight-reindeer crew
Arrived on the roof in the midst of our screw,
It’s likely that we would have paid them no heed;
We were both getting all of the presents we need.


On Comet!  On Cupid!  On Dasher and Dancer!
Each of us is the other one’s horny romancer.
There’s just one thing more sweet than a sweet Christmas cookie --
I’m referring, of course, to sweet Christmas Eve nookie.



Chris O' Carroll