Brendan Beary : 9 -- 4, Alternating Thursdays

Duncan says A, whereas Freddie says B.
The hair-splitting rages interminably.
They posture and preen, immature, imbecilic –
Stu wants the alphabet all in Cyrillic.

Dean works the contracts and Jeanne handles cost;
Anne notes how much of the schedule we've lost.
Johnny defers his opinions to Joan,
Who not too discreetly plays cards on her phone.

Cutting folks off or else egging them on --
Buzzwords and jargon fly hither and yon.
Office recorder and gossip Inez
Distinctly recalls every word no one says.

Hazel wants scapegoats for all of our gaffes;
Leonard shows copious meaningless graphs –
Tables that no one on earth comprehends;
Sue wants our means to all match up with ends.

Carrie's pet project and Harry's pet peeve,
Longing for lunchtime and looking to leave,
But damn! We're outsmarted – it's clear we can't win:
Our captors, the bosses, have lunch ordered in!

George claims to know what the marketplace wants;
Beth fights the urge to shout "Balls" in response.
All that he seeks is promotion upstairs –
"The market" is not on the list of his cares.

Disputing, dismissing, dissembling, dissenting,
Mishearing, misleading and misrepresenting,
This day's like a steeplechase course that we run -
We finish no further than where we'd begun!

(Ed says, "Before we adjourn for the day,
I'd like to revisit this B-versus-A…")